What is it about being busy that is acceptable…almost glorified? You can’t take time to read a great new article at work, you should do that on your “own time”. At home the list of chores and things to do are endless enough to busy me until I drop. But I’m tired, so tired.
And when I examine that tiredness, I realize somewhere along the line, I adopted a definition of worth based on busyness. If I am busy and productive, then I am something. Really something.
Digging a little deeper, I realize the shame in being perceived as lazy, slow, unproductive. It’s my blind belief in shame that keeps me from sitting, enjoying, reading, writing, just being with those who mean the most to me. Instead, I fuss, fix, clean and drive separation from the very thing my heart longs for….connection.
When I’m honest, it’s true connection that means the most to me. It’s the thing that memories are made of. It’s where I’m fully alive, have impact, create my best work, it’s where I can change the world. That kind of connection takes courage and vulnerability. That kind of connection can not coexist with busyness.
So in a commitment to myself and to those around me who mean so much, I intend to do whole lot more of enjoying the moment.