Life, Parenting

Help! Someone Save Me From Myself

After a relatively crazy travel schedule, I told the boss, I need some time off.  So, I planned four days off at home.  Four. Full. Days.  For a working mother, heck a woman at all, that is a luxury!  I imagine the scene, almost in slow motion.  A June Cleaver grin spreads across my face as I dream of the lingering at home, the perfectly clean home, meals prepared, the entire day in my pjs (OK, that’s NOT June Cleaver, but she wasn’t real anyway).  I’ll take a nap, do some crafts, bake, relax….well, you get the idea. Feeling like a child at Christmas, I almost giggle to myself imaging FOUR-FULL-DAYS to reign in my home. Alone. Doing whatever I please.

Because I can’t ever just “settle down”, I vacuum and dust the whole house, finish the dishes and shine the counters so I can relax. Once things feel relatively peaceful, I seek for the ever elusive, magical kingdom called, a NAP.  (Insert sound of angelic hosts and a soft glow here).  I’ve kicked my shoes off, settled in to my bed, little dog by my side, big dog on her bed.  Deep exhale as I let myself go.  I’m drifting, drifting, BAM! Eyes wide open like a gunshot went off, I jump up to go switch the load of laundry. After all, I can’t relax if I think about those clothes growing sour with time. Then, I’ll settle back down and rest for real.

Take 2 – settle in, deep exhale, drif….BAM! Phone rings in the other room.  What if it’s the kids. They need me.  I dash out of bed to answer…was a survey.  Sorry about the curt refusal honey, you called me back from the magic kingdom for this???!!!

Take 3 – settle in, deep…BAM! Dogs hear something and begin to bark! It’s a knock on the door.  I put on my best smile through annoyance and open the front door.  Really? Really?  Sure I’ll buy your $20 bag of carmel corn to help the Cub Scouts. Now leave me alone!

Take 4 – Settle in, ah, hell.  Who am I fooling?  Get up to begin dinner and fold the laundry.

Unfortunate genetics (sorry mom!) or personality has to be the blame.  Try as I might, relaxing and doing nothing fits like a square peg in my round world.  Somebody save me from myself!

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